| Scintillater |
so, my bf is younger than me and has a son....
so they said "we wouldn't approve if you got married"
we've been dating 7 months, never SAID anything about that....they don't even know him.
*sigh* |
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| Spike7ss |
The way i see it if you truely feel for the guy than who is to say who you can be with
I know some one whos GF is 5 years older, you couldnt tell teh difference |
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| redbaron303 |
Yunn.... I know it's something to have your parents approving of your sig. other, but in the end.... I say do what makes you happy!
If it's being with him, then stay with him.... even if that means not listening to your parents.! |
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| s2oooR |
quote: Originally posted by Spike7ss
I know some one whos GF is 5 years older, you couldnt tell teh difference
Yeah, look at me....heck, you'd think I was the younger one! hahahaha.... :unsure: :lol: :huh: |
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| driving a lemon |
| All your parents seem to want is to you not to get hurt.. It seems like they feel that your gonna be in way over your head.. prove to them that you are mature enough to deal with such a situation.. I am sure if they seee how happy this fella makes yopu feel then they will have to grow to love him.. if not really follow your heart.. if you really love this guy then stick wwith him.. You go for it! |
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| quickshifter2 |
quote: Originally posted by driving a lemon
All your parents seem to want is to you not to get hurt.. It seems like they feel that your gonna be in way over your head.. prove to them that you are mature enough to deal with such a situation.. I am sure if they seee how happy this fella makes yopu feel then they will have to grow to love him.. if not really follow your heart.. if you really love this guy then stick wwith him.. You go for it!
Well as I don't even know you, all I can say is that you have to look into this relationship with both eyes wide open. Realize that at some point you could be taking on the role as the stepmom, and are you ok with that? I don't know how old you are but ask yourself, am I ready for this type of responcibility in my life. If you are all the best to you, but if your not change your plans before your only left with one road to take.
Your parents are not trying to make him out tobe the bad guy by saying all that about him, but hell if I had a daughter I'd be over protective of her aswell.
Good luck |
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| Scintillater |
of course i've considered all the possibilities of what could happen. I mean, i'm not old, but i'm not super young either. I've dated quite a bit...and this is the most "complicated" situation i've ever been in by far. I KNOW my parents are looking out for me, because if i had a daughter and she was thinking about hooking up with some guy i didn't know that was younger than her and had a child, i'd FREEEEAK. My parents play a very important part in my life, and i don't want to antagonize them, but it's very difficult.
i want them to at least give him a chance, but they refuse to. they're barely agreeing to look at him as a friend. basically, they've said that i'm young, stupid, could find myself a "suitable" bf (aka someone who looks better on paper) and taht in time he will find a "suitable" gf (not i). anyhow...it's not like i'm saying i'm running off and getting married and not considering everything. obviously time will tell...but during this time...what can i do to make peace? |
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| -]TooL[- |
Very personal question, lots of good advise. quickshifter2 prolly the best overall.
love is an awesome thing if you have it. if your in love and want to have a family than hell yeah! power to ya. but even if you know you not ready for something to last, does he know you feel that way? find out what he's looking for and that can help you make your decision aswell. if he's looking for "the one" you should know that, does he think your the one? lots of questions to ask yourself, youve prolly already asked yourself them but, i feel the best way to make a decision, know all the facts! good luck with your predicament. :bigthumbup: |
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| POX |
| i dono.. see if you can get them to know him better.. |
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| REFLUX |
quote: Originally posted by Scintillater
basically, they've said that i'm young, stupid, could find myself a "suitable" bf
As long as your parents are alive you will always be "young & stupid"
that is....until you're about 40-something and still single and your not being married & without a family brings shame to your parents
hahaha
g/l Yunn, talk to your parents or have them meet him :) |
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| Insomniac |
dump your parents!
the way i see it they will never understand, until you marry the guy and they are forced to accept it.
shitty truth IMO, sometimes life sucks |
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| s2oooR |
quote: Originally posted by Insomniac
dump your parents!
the way i see it they will never understand, until you marry the guy and they are forced to accept it.
shitty truth IMO, sometimes life sucks
yeah, just marry him....if it doesnt work out just divorce him? :wacko: |
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| Scintillater |
| yes....marry then divorce. that'll teach 'em! i'm not trying to show my parents the error of their ways here, but just to be a bit more open minded . they've already met him before they knew we were together, and of course, they liked him then. but now it's become such an awkward subject. they're so oldschool they think if i keep going out with him even though they've told me they don't approve, that i'm doing it to defy them, not because i truly want to be with this person. :blink: it's twisted i know. but i don't want them to feel that way, and at the same time, i don't want my bf to feel like he's now a write-off of society in my parents eyes because that's not fair to him either. |
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| GirlRacer P1 |
| If your parents don't want to accept him, they won't. There is nothing you can say or do to change that. |
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| Scintillater |
WELL then. that just sucks.
:thumbsdown: |
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| SpecV_Ryder2 |
| I think it would only make the situation worse..because now they KNOW that you two are a couple and sure they accepted him THEN because he was not part of your life. i can somehow relate to this when I met my girlfriend she and I had different beliefs..she's Christian and i'm Catholic...her parent basically didn't approve of me because I was not on the same page..basically, it was rough for the first year, her and I not being the same level and her parents just didn't like...so all in all, her parents basically wanted what's good for her..BUT, I proved them wrong, I let time do it's thing..and I guess for you is just talk to them sensibly, and tell you parents how responsible he is because of his son, if he can take care of his son, i'm sure that he'll even be more loving to you because he knows that he wants you to be by his side, not the fact that's just because, 7 months is nothing to sneeze at and obviously you both want to be each other. just give it time and don't stress about it too much...just me 2 :bigthumbup: |
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| colossus |
| Your parents want whats best for you. The fact he is already a father may the root of their issue. But your an adult now, so unless you still live under their roof, you have a right to make your own choices! -_- |
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| badger |
hey, as long as your are happy, the dude treats you right, that is what matters.
your parents should realize this is what makes you happy and should support you regardless... sure, they can voice concerns etc, but ultimately they must realize you have to make your own choices to grow from them |
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| Drifted |
I know my perents didnt aprove of my now wife but after they realised that we were gunna be together for the rest of our lives ..they warmed up to her and now think she is great..... if he has a kid you might want to think about the extra berden of what futur court cost could be and the pain in the ass of dealing with the mother of his child eh ... look way into the future if your gunna look at all.
my two cents for ya |
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| Scintillater |
yah....i know i have to just let time do it's thing and see if even the two of us last before my parents say NO. hahahah. but, you guys don't know my parents...man....they are STUUUUBBBORRRNNN! well...we'll see what happens!
Thanks for all the feedback :) |
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| BlueTurboEGG |
Well I certainly hope things work out for you Yunn.
If you need anything, let me know ;) |
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| ChromeDragon |
quote: Originally posted by Casanova
I say dump him.
No really, always late for photoshoots! lol j/k:p |
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| Casanova |
hahahha i said im sorry :(
speaking of which ill msn you to clean up some details |
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| Insomniac |
| I agree with Casanova. Dump the loser and find a real man.:eek: |
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| GTS Jeff |
| im just curious why there is all this talk about marriage after 7 (now 8) months. |
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| POX |
| they may come aroudn wiht time.. my gf's parents have started to :bthumbup: |
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| Seks |
quote: Originally posted by Scintillater
so, my bf is younger than me and has a son....
so they said "we wouldn't approve if you got married"
we've been dating 7 months, never SAID anything about that....they don't even know him.
*sigh*
I'm not suprised. Chinese parents, what do you expect??? |
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