| The Girlfriends Parents - Click HERE for Original Thread |
| 30psi_on4banger |
How do you cope with it if they are complete and utter assfucks?
Repeativly telling my gf that im no good, not handsome (haha), she can do better, is a loser, is going no where, shes stupid, shes never going to pass college. etc
Verbally they abuse her so bad, Her dad threatens to hit her, Stops at full swing of a punch and says "WATCH IT".. Uhh tells her every day to find another guy, Doesnt let me stay over night there at all anymore, avoids having dinner with me when im there..
I know and everyone else thinks im doing good for myself, I work construction, make lots of money, save it all for a house and to get into real estate investing, Have investments, car, place, no debt etc..
I already am being the "better guy", by not saying anything, They NEVER say anything to my face , Its ALWAYS through my girlfriend, They just are quiet when im around.. I've never done anything bad, Just when me and her get in fights , They see her sad and there excuse is they dont like seeing there girl sad blah blah..
Its been two years! And we've been in 2 fights lol
Also they harass my girlfriend when they say I have a rainday, They think that I quit or something, They think I'm lying that I have the day off etc..
What can I do? What will make them feel and look like shit without me being an asshole or disrespecting them?
Thank you sirs |
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| Inzane |
quote:
Originally posted by 30psi_on4banger
What can I do?
Just... get the hell outta dodge! |
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| Prudz_lude |
that sucks ass.
If you want to make them look like idiots what you can do is prove them wrong on a further note. You said you are saving up for a house as well you want to start investing in real estate. Do it, it's that simple. I am sure if you prove to them that you are going to do all of those things you say they will shut the fuck up. If they don't you will never win them over.
Does your girlfriend still love you? If so then who cares what her parents think. My girlfriends parents are not that fond of me either but it does not matter to either of us because it is not their relationship. It is yours and your girlfriends and nobody elses.
I say keep dating her and suck it up if you actually love her. If you end up moving in together than look at it this way, you will never really have to see them much anymore. If it progresses to marriage and you have your own house, you are investing in real estate and doing well off for yourself than that is awesome. If your in-laws are still see you as shit who cares. they are in-laws and you are living the life you would enjoy.
It's always nice to have a girlfriend who's parents like you but you have to remember your not dating your girlfriend for her parents. You are dating her for her.
It's funny i have a friend who would always go out with girls and when he met the parents the parents would always end up liking my friend (luc) more than the girls would themselves. I lawled all the time. |
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| 30psi_on4banger |
| I will stay with my GF no matter.. I just find it annoying |
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| TrevorK |
quote:
Originally posted by 30psi_on4banger
I will stay with my GF no matter.. I just find it annoying
I have a similar situation with mine - eventually over time, if they truly care for their daughter they will start to be more friendly towards you because they realize it means a lot to her. I _think_ my girlfriends parents are slowly starting to come around after our incident. It's been awhile, but I do go over once in awhile (my GF doesn't live at her parents) these days and things are hospitable. I wouldn't say we're on a friendly basis, but more of a neutral basis (Which is a big improvement).
I think the first step is your girlfriend communicating that she does not appreciate your parents feelings and thoughts towards you. The rift isn't between you and them, it's typically between the parents and their child.
Because you're dating their daughter, they are allowed to exercise their feelings towards you, because they are not the "bad guys" for doing it towards their daughter. You are the easy target, and anything they blame their daughter for will just be focussed on you.
Your girlfriend will need to fix her relationship with them before you can have a meaningful relationship with them. This may never happen, and if you're comfortable with that and so is she, that's OK. But I would strongly advise considering all your future options (children especially) before settling for non-communication.
The parents may not agree with their daughters choices in life, however they have to respect the fact that she has the freedom to make the choices she wants. They may turn out horrible, they may turn out amazing - but they are her choices to make and the consequences/rewards are hers to deal with.
Until there is mutual respect between the parents and child you will have a very difficult time getting respect between you (daughter's boyfriend) and the parents. |
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| dtjohnst |
quote:
Originally posted by Prudz_lude
that sucks ass.
If you want to make them look like idiots what you can do is prove them wrong on a further note. You said you are saving up for a house as well you want to start investing in real estate. Do it, it's that simple. I am sure if you prove to them that you are going to do all of those things you say they will shut the fuck up. If they don't you will never win them over.
Does your girlfriend still love you? If so then who cares what her parents think. My girlfriends parents are not that fond of me either but it does not matter to either of us because it is not their relationship. It is yours and your girlfriends and nobody elses.
I say keep dating her and suck it up if you actually love her. If you end up moving in together than look at it this way, you will never really have to see them much anymore. If it progresses to marriage and you have your own house, you are investing in real estate and doing well off for yourself than that is awesome. If your in-laws are still see you as shit who cares. they are in-laws and you are living the life you would enjoy.
It's always nice to have a girlfriend who's parents like you but you have to remember your not dating your girlfriend for her parents. You are dating her for her.
It's funny i have a friend who would always go out with girls and when he met the parents the parents would always end up liking my friend (luc) more than the girls themselves. I lawled all the time.
What? Parents would like your friend MORE than their own child? I call bullshit on that. That's absolute nonsense. "Hello stranger. We like you more than our daughter. Please take her trust fund instead."
Also, why waste time "proving" anything to anyone? If they don't respect you, why should you respect them? There's no need to prove anything to anyone. There's absolutely nothing you can do. Your girlfriend could, but obviously she's lacking the balls to stand up to her folks, which can be hard. Get on with life and ignore them. |
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| Xtra_X |
Get her pregnant?:dunno:
Worked for me!:thumbup: |
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| bluSRT |
Give dad a punch in the throat, guaranteed to leave him speechless. :boxing:
:D :p |
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| euro777 |
if you need the approval from her family find another girl, or you could just spend less time caring what other people think and use that time to do something productive, like...modding car, real estate research, drinkin beer!!
time is our most prescious resource (maybe a tie with land) dont waste it wondering who thinks what!! |
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| Prudz_lude |
quote:
Originally posted by dtjohnst
What? Parents would like your friend MORE than their own child? I call bullshit on that. That's absolute nonsense. "Hello stranger. We like you more than our daughter. Please take her trust fund instead."
Also, why waste time "proving" anything to anyone? If they don't respect you, why should you respect them? There's no need to prove anything to anyone. There's absolutely nothing you can do. Your girlfriend could, but obviously she's lacking the balls to stand up to her folks, which can be hard. Get on with life and ignore them.
Fuck dude i said there parents would like him more than the girl WOULD. (there edited for you) :p
Nobody has to prove anything to anybody but like i said if they guy loves his girl and wants to keep her than if he feels the need to make his relationship with the parents better proving himself to them will do this if they are not completely fucked in the head. I agree with what trevok said. |
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| Fazda |
| i would agree with the throat punch |
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| ehos |
| It's hardwired. They're not really supposed to like you. Don't take it personally. |
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| Kiddo |
| yeah its a parent's job to protect their child haha try having them call you "son" the first time you meet them, man that just scares the crap outta me lol |
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| ChromeDragon |
For the dad it's simple. Whip it out and stare him down to assert your dominance. Don't say anything, just keep staring him down. Eventually he'll roll over and you'll be in control.
The mother, well that can be a little complicated since often the same approach will cause her to drop to her knees and go hard. So usually just a good, hard five-across-the-eyes approach gets things done.
Good luck!:thumbup: |
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| ehrgeiz |
This reminds me of a song......
"So I grabbed the stupid bitch by her nappy ass weave
started talkin' shit, would'nt you know?
I reached back like a pimp and I slapped the hoe'
And her father stood up and he started to shout
So I threw a right-cross and knocked his old ass out" |
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| Prudz_lude |
quote:
Originally posted by ChromeDragon
For the dad it's simple. Whip it out and stare him down to assert your dominance. Don't say anything, just keep staring him down. Eventually he'll roll over and you'll be in control.
The mother, well that can be a little complicated since often the same approach will cause her to drop to her knees and go hard. So usually just a good, hard five-across-the-eyes approach gets things done.
Good luck!:thumbup:
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: |
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| mot_bot |
quote:
Originally posted by ehrgeiz
This reminds me of a song......
"So I grabbed the stupid bitch by her nappy ass weave
started talkin' shit, would'nt you know?
I reached back like a pimp and I slapped the hoe'
And her father stood up and he started to shout
So I threw a right-cross and knocked his old ass out"
EAZY E, ftw lol!! |
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| Realistic |
quote:
Originally posted by ehrgeiz
This reminds me of a song......
"So I grabbed the stupid bitch by her nappy ass weave
started talkin' shit, would'nt you know?
I reached back like a pimp and I slapped the hoe'
And her father stood up and he started to shout
So I threw a right-cross and knocked his old ass out"
dynamite hack is awesome!!!!
I had kinda the same issue with my gf.
her step dad hated me while HIS family liked me, my gf's family liked me, my gf's mom's family liked me. it was only him. After awhile he had to come to terms that I wasn't going anywhere..
turns out, I can't stand most of her family, and I only really enjoy the step-dads company |
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| mot_bot |
quote:
Originally posted by Realistic
dynamite hack is awesome!!!!
I had kinda the same issue with my gf.
her step dad hated me while HIS family liked me, my gf's family liked me, my gf's mom's family liked me. it was only him. After awhile he had to come to terms that I wasn't going anywhere..
turns out, I can't stand most of her family, and I only really enjoy the step-dads company
Who the hell is dynamite Hack???? |
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| GOT BOOST |
quote:
Originally posted by 30psi_on4banger
How do you cope with it if they are complete and utter assfucks?
Repeativly telling my gf that im no good, not handsome (haha), she can do better, is a loser, is going no where, shes stupid, shes never going to pass college. etc
Verbally they abuse her so bad, Her dad threatens to hit her, Stops at full swing of a punch and says "WATCH IT".. Uhh tells her every day to find another guy, Doesnt let me stay over night there at all anymore, avoids having dinner with me when im there..
I know and everyone else thinks im doing good for myself, I work construction, make lots of money, save it all for a house and to get into real estate investing, Have investments, car, place, no debt etc..
I already am being the "better guy", by not saying anything, They NEVER say anything to my face , Its ALWAYS through my girlfriend, They just are quiet when im around.. I've never done anything bad, Just when me and her get in fights , They see her sad and there excuse is they dont like seeing there girl sad blah blah..
Its been two years! And we've been in 2 fights lol
Also they harass my girlfriend when they say I have a rainday, They think that I quit or something, They think I'm lying that I have the day off etc..
What can I do? What will make them feel and look like shit without me being an asshole or disrespecting them?
Thank you sirs
Hi 30psi_on4banger,
I would be curious to see what her parents do, and what social class they belong in. I suspect there may be a sort of resentment that you have done well at a young age and they were not in the same boat at that age.
Have you asked your GF why they do not like you? I would be inclined to sit them down directly and have a little chat with them. Ask them why they do not like you. People do not like people for some reason. Mostly it is dumb reason, such as having opposing points of views on something, sometimes there is a legit and valid reason.
On the surface it appears you are doing well. I would keep taking the high road and not sink to their level. It is hard sometimes to take the high road, but it always pays off in the end.
Mike |
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| ae1969 |
quote:
Originally posted by 30psi_on4banger
1...........Repeativly telling my gf that im no good, not handsome (haha), she can do better, is a loser, is going no where....
2.........Uhh tells her every day to find another guy, Doesnt let me stay over night there at all anymore, avoids having dinner with me when im there..
3......... I've never done anything bad, Just when me and her get in fights , They see her sad and there excuse is they dont like seeing there girl sad blah blah.. Its been two years! And we've been in 2 fights lol
4.........Also they harass my girlfriend when they say I have a rainday, They think that I quit or something, They think I'm lying that I have the day off etc..
5.......... What can I do? What will make them feel and look like shit without me being an asshole or disrespecting them?
Thank you sirs
It is difficult to understand a situation when you only hear the one side but some things in your post struck my attention. My comments are below in relation to the points I have numbered.
Point 1. A natural protective instinct. Something about you........right or wrong is giving them a negative vibe. What it is only you know.
Point 2. This tells me that at one point they let you into there home. Somehow something changed, again none of us know the details, but my hunch is that this probably relates to #1 and #3.
Point 3. This concerns me. Although you have only had two fights, they must of created quite an impression on her parents for you to point them out.
Point 4. Not sure where they get the idea you are a dead beat. Then again we don't know the details but I am sure there is something that is making them think you are dead end when it comes to there daughter.
Point 5. I don't get it? You want advice on how you can make them feel and look like shit without disrespecting them? This points to your level of inmaturity.
Do what a man would do. Have a chat with her parents. If you care about this woman you can explain your intentions and explain any past issues/tensions you may have had.
If you feel that you can't be bothered to take the time to make amends then do what is right for this woman and break it off. She is willing to tolerate her parents abuse to stay with you and if you can't make the effort to set things right then do the right thing and walk away.
Thats my 2 cents. |
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| EDISKRAD EHT |
quote:
Originally posted by Xtra_X
Get her pregnant?:dunno:
Worked for me!:thumbup:
That's what I did with my Ex (After we broke up), but it was the other way around. I hate her mom with a passion.:realmad:
So now i'm stuck with her for life.:mad: |
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| 30psi_on4banger |
quote:
Originally posted by ae1969
It is difficult to understand a situation when you only hear the one side but some things in your post struck my attention. My comments are below in relation to the points I have numbered.
Point 1. A natural protective instinct. Something about you........right or wrong is giving them a negative vibe. What it is only you know.
Point 2. This tells me that at one point they let you into there home. Somehow something changed, again none of us know the details, but my hunch is that this probably relates to #1 and #3.
Point 3. This concerns me. Although you have only had two fights, they must of created quite an impression on her parents for you to point them out.
Point 4. Not sure where they get the idea you are a dead beat. Then again we don't know the details but I am sure there is something that is making them think you are dead end when it comes to there daughter.
Point 5. I don't get it? You want advice on how you can make them feel and look like shit without disrespecting them? This points to your level of inmaturity.
Do what a man would do. Have a chat with her parents. If you care about this woman you can explain your intentions and explain any past issues/tensions you may have had.
If you feel that you can't be bothered to take the time to make amends then do what is right for this woman and break it off. She is willing to tolerate her parents abuse to stay with you and if you can't make the effort to set things right then do the right thing and walk away.
Thats my 2 cents.
Thanks Dr Phil , Do you do private parties? |
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| Dublin_19 |
quote:
Originally posted by 30psi_on4banger
Thanks Dr Phil , Do you do private parties?
:lol: |
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| kevito_ |
It can take them a few years to warm up to you. Give it more time. If they still are the same way, you're just going to have to learn to live with it. Some people are assfucks and some people aren't.
It's your girlfriend that matters, right?
If you take care of her and if shes happy her parents will probably will be happy, eventually. Some people never come around, though. That's just life. You might have to talk to them about it directly... but it's all your call. |
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| 30psi_on4banger |
quote:
Originally posted by kevito_
It can take them a few years to warm up to you. Give it more time. If they still are the same way, you're just going to have to learn to live with it. Some people are assfucks and some people aren't.
It's your girlfriend that matters, right?
If you take care of her and if shes happy her parents will probably will be happy, eventually. Some people never come around, though. That's just life. You might have to talk to them about it directly... but it's all your call.
I appreciate your thoughts
Thanks I agree |
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